Mind your Manhers- Out With The Old

In this upbeat world of technology there are many new things popping up all the time whether it is new technology, flesh eating humans or new records being broken.  The one thing that I feel like that is keeping us back as a society is old people.  In my opinion old people are what is holding America back from getting out of this recession and climbing back up the ladder of Global Superpowers.  To be honest what do old people really bring to the table anyway?  They can't work, they don't remember anything, they can't control their bodily functions and they smell bad.  People may bring up the fact that old people are wise because of their life experiences and that they have a lot to teach us, but we all know that is just because people would look at you weird if you said old people suck.  Don't get me wrong I appreciate everything that old people have done whether it is serving our country, inventing the wheel or yelling at kids to get of their lawns.  The truth is that old people are sucking this country dry.   Many of them take jobs that we can offer to young people who would prefer to not have to do manual labor for a living.  Old people are taking up all the fun and easy jobs and with them out of the way there would be more young people who have actual family's to support and who don't just work because their bored.   I believe this would open many jobs in the customer service field and provide Wal-Mart with a group of fresh faces from the unemployment line to fill all their greeter jobs.

My proposal for getting the geezer population under control is to create and age limit for America.  I know that this will not make everyone happy because nobody wants to be separated from their loved ones.  If we set the age limit for our country at 65 we would be able to not only weed out the Alzheimer and Dementia population, but it would also decrease the likely hood of having to go through the pain of watching your loved ones die slow painful deaths. It would also open up some full and part time jobs that old people used to take up. Not to mention the fact that it would help to take some strain off of the Hospital systems of America. I'm sure the biggest question that people are asking themselves is what do you plan on doing with the old people?  That’s a good question.  Don't worry I’m not going to kill them; instead I have a useful solution.  Why waste perfectly semi-useful people when you can just send them to another country.  If we just sent all the old people to Africa it would kill two birds with one stone.  Not only would it get rid of all the old people but it would also help out Africa.   I think that the influx of old people in Africa would be great for their economy.  It could help end child armies, with warlords going towards a more developed, smarter and more expendable army of old people who may even have military experience.  The influx of the elderly will also help to end hunger since all the old ladies will undoubtedly have gardens and spend their time feeding the hunger ridden children since they miss their own grandchildren and want somebody to listen to their stories about how much things have changed since they were kids and how when they were kids everything apparently cost a nickel.  Not only will having all of our old old people help Africa significantly it will also help to save America from the many disasters, like eventual Zombie apocalypse, with all of the weak old people gone we will be able to better protect ourselves from the eventual zombie hoard especially because then we wouldn't have to feel bad about having to kill our parents and grandparents.